used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
You were trust falling into bushes
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
