I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
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