Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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