Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.