i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
So vagazzling was a success
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
