dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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