Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
