If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize