why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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