my shit smells like andre
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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