The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
love makes seman taste better
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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