I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
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It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
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I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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