your room smells of hookers.
And success
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
