I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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