he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
