Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
