you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
You took a bar mat shot.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
