summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Sext me about skeletons
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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