hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
