Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
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