We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
