you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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