They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
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