you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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