I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
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