I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
