why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
He passed out mid-signature
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
