i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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