my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize