I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
honey bunches of taint.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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