dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
