there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
