Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
