We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Randomize
