I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize
