Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
Randomize