i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Randomize
