I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
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