I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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