you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Randomize
