arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
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