so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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