The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
