Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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