I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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