just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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