And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
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I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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