so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Randomize
