so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
