Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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